I realize as I get older, that loss comes in many forms. More than I can possibly keep track of.
There was certainly a loss of innocence when I went through my divorce.
A loss of ... certainty ... confidence when DD1 moved away.
A loss of humility with the birth of my 4th child.
The heart ache of loss each time a loved on passes.
Deep saddening loss when someone you think you can count on lets you down ...
I have experienced a fair share of loss, certainly not as much as some I know ... but enough to know the pain.
Today I experienced a different sort of loss ...
You know, I am new to the church membership thing ... I have long gone to church, but only the last couple of years belonged to a church -- so I am not sure how to word or deal with the sense of loss that I feel today.
Our Pastor is leaving. His reasons are valid and true; he feels God's calling in a new direction ... how can one argue with that?
He has been with this church for well over a decade; far longer than most Pastor's stay with a congregation - but he has only been with me for two years ... I am not done yet. I am not done learning from him, getting to know him, encouraging him ... loving him and his wonderful family. I.AM.NOT.DONE.YET.
And I am not ready to start over. I have only just gotten comfortable sharing my faith with people ... I am not ready to start over, reveal myself to another person who shouldn't judge me but might. What if the new Pastor isn't as kind ... as understanding ... as passionate about the things that made this church home for me ...
I.AM.NOT.DONE.YET.
But he is ... and ultimately he has to follow the call ... and I will be happy for him and his family. And I will welcome the new Pastor and pray for the congregation - that we can make a change like this and have it be a good one ...
Blessings ...
Nettie
There was certainly a loss of innocence when I went through my divorce.
A loss of ... certainty ... confidence when DD1 moved away.
A loss of humility with the birth of my 4th child.
The heart ache of loss each time a loved on passes.
Deep saddening loss when someone you think you can count on lets you down ...
I have experienced a fair share of loss, certainly not as much as some I know ... but enough to know the pain.
Today I experienced a different sort of loss ...
You know, I am new to the church membership thing ... I have long gone to church, but only the last couple of years belonged to a church -- so I am not sure how to word or deal with the sense of loss that I feel today.
Our Pastor is leaving. His reasons are valid and true; he feels God's calling in a new direction ... how can one argue with that?
He has been with this church for well over a decade; far longer than most Pastor's stay with a congregation - but he has only been with me for two years ... I am not done yet. I am not done learning from him, getting to know him, encouraging him ... loving him and his wonderful family. I.AM.NOT.DONE.YET.
And I am not ready to start over. I have only just gotten comfortable sharing my faith with people ... I am not ready to start over, reveal myself to another person who shouldn't judge me but might. What if the new Pastor isn't as kind ... as understanding ... as passionate about the things that made this church home for me ...
I.AM.NOT.DONE.YET.
But he is ... and ultimately he has to follow the call ... and I will be happy for him and his family. And I will welcome the new Pastor and pray for the congregation - that we can make a change like this and have it be a good one ...
Blessings ...
Nettie
God Is Our Refuge
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
Therefore will we not fear, though the earth do change,
and though the mountains be moved into the heart of the seas;
Though the waters thereof roar and foam,
Though the waters thereof roar and foam,
though the mountains shake at the swelling thereof. Selah
There is a river, the streams whereof make glad the city of God,
There is a river, the streams whereof make glad the city of God,
the holiest dwelling-place of the Most High.
God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved; God shall help her,
God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved; God shall help her,
at the approach of morning.
Nations were in tumult, kingdoms were moved;
Nations were in tumult, kingdoms were moved;
He uttered His voice, the earth melted.
HaShem of hosts is with us;
HaShem of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our high tower. Selah
Come, behold the works of HaShem,
Come, behold the works of HaShem,
who hath made desolations in the earth.
He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth;
He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth;
He breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder;
He burneth the chariots in the fire.
'Let be, and know that I am God;
'Let be, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.'
- Psalms 46: 2-11
- Psalms 46: 2-11
1 comments:
I understand your feelings.
I have thought about our pastor leaving--about part of me leaving. We do become tied to our shepherds.
I pray that this new man of God will have something for you that the last one could not provide.
One thing I know--the great shepherd guards His own. He will provide for our needs.
Good to have you back Nettie.
I noticed in your verses that you used HaShem. I learned about the usage of this word for the Lord in a Beth Moore Bible study.
She said that when the priests would call on this name that they would automatically close their eyes because they knew the glory of the Lord was about to descend.
Amazing--may the glory of the LORD descend in your life today.
Post a Comment